How To: Button a Shirt and Eat a Bagel Simultaneously

So, you’re a busy guy, kinda like me (kinda, depends on the day). You get up early in the morning and you still don’t have time for breakfast, or you just don’t feel like eating. Still you put your pants on and a t-shirt. You go out into the kitchen and fix a bagel with cream cheese (high class, I know). Then you realize that you gotta get a button shirt for what ever you’re gonna do today (busy guy remember). But you don’t have time to eat a bagel and put your shirt on, you gotta do both at the same time. Well I’ve been in this scenario and am here to talk you through it.

First, select a shirt.  The bagel shouldn’t affect this, just be careful to not get crumbs in your closet. Then remove the shirt from the rack and stick your non-dominant arm (the one not holding the bagel) through the correct sleeve (make sure it is the correct sleeve). Swap your bagel to the other hand and do the same with the other sleeve. Now button your cuffs by ‘breaking’ your wrist down and then buttoning with your index finger and thumb (this is one of the trickier parts). Make sure your bagel is in your non-dominant hand before buttoning each of the shirt buttons after lining them up at the bottom (or not if you don’t mind crooked shirts). Button by using your index finger to grab the button and your thumb to guide it. You should have finished your bagel by now and so you can button the top button and put on a tie or whatever now. I just put a note book and a pen in my pocket and I’m good to go.

It’s that simple! I know some of you really need this guide. I know it would have helped me in this situation, although looking things up on the internet while eating a bagel is a completely different guide. I hope it helps some of you out there.

Speak Your Mind 73 #361-365

QUESTIONS

1. Do you make your bed every morning?

2. What do you do when you feel bored?

3. How old do you think your gym teacher is?

4. What is your favorite Halloween costume you ever wore?

5. What color was your hair when you were one year old?

ANSWERS By: Austin Smith

1. No, I never make my bed, it makes is easier for bedbugs to set up camp.

2. I either get on the internet or work, I’m embarrassed of the one I do more often.

3. I no longer go to school.

4. I was a soldier so many times that has to be it.

5. I think it was auburn.