Speak Your Mind 87 #431-435


1. Do you think the governor of your state is doing a good job?

2. Would you rather a coat button or zip?

3. How old are you?

4. Why do you think it hurts so much when you get a tiny piece of dirt in your eye.

5. Have you ever sat in a hot tub at a hotel?

ANSWERS By: Austin Smith

1. Rick Perry? No, not really, but he isn’t terrible.

2. Button honestly.

3. I am 16.

4. Because your eye is important and your brain makes you hurt more when important stuff can be damaged.

5. No, I don’t like hot tubs.

How To: Button a Shirt and Eat a Bagel Simultaneously

So, you’re a busy guy, kinda like me (kinda, depends on the day). You get up early in the morning and you still don’t have time for breakfast, or you just don’t feel like eating. Still you put your pants on and a t-shirt. You go out into the kitchen and fix a bagel with cream cheese (high class, I know). Then you realize that you gotta get a button shirt for what ever you’re gonna do today (busy guy remember). But you don’t have time to eat a bagel and put your shirt on, you gotta do both at the same time. Well I’ve been in this scenario and am here to talk you through it.

First, select a shirt.  The bagel shouldn’t affect this, just be careful to not get crumbs in your closet. Then remove the shirt from the rack and stick your non-dominant arm (the one not holding the bagel) through the correct sleeve (make sure it is the correct sleeve). Swap your bagel to the other hand and do the same with the other sleeve. Now button your cuffs by ‘breaking’ your wrist down and then buttoning with your index finger and thumb (this is one of the trickier parts). Make sure your bagel is in your non-dominant hand before buttoning each of the shirt buttons after lining them up at the bottom (or not if you don’t mind crooked shirts). Button by using your index finger to grab the button and your thumb to guide it. You should have finished your bagel by now and so you can button the top button and put on a tie or whatever now. I just put a note book and a pen in my pocket and I’m good to go.

It’s that simple! I know some of you really need this guide. I know it would have helped me in this situation, although looking things up on the internet while eating a bagel is a completely different guide. I hope it helps some of you out there.

Speak Your Mind 46 #226-230


1. What street do you live on?

2. Do you like pants that button instead of zip?

3. What do you think is the best color for the outside of a house?

4. Do you think guys should ever have to vacuum?

5. Which would you rather buy: a skateboard or a bike?

ANSWERS By: Austin Smith

1. I live on eighth street.

2. My pants do both, but buttons are very nice, yes.

3. Most likely white a a pale yellow.

4. If then man is single of course he has to vacuum, and if he’s not, there is no reason he shouldn’t, he should have an agreement of some kind with is partner.

5. A bike for me has more usefulness, with being in the middle of nowhere and all.